I love "free" offers. So this last month I sent in my coupon to receive a free copy of a brand new magazine called "Cookie". It was advertised as being a magazine that offered "all the best for your family". What it failed to mention was that it is all the best for your family if you happen to be REALLY, REALLY rich. I knew I was in trouble when I opened the cover and found a succession of ads for Ralph Lauren, Burberry, DKNY and Guess clothing for CHILDREN! Then it elaborated on the items the models on the front cover were wearing...the darling mother kneeling down on the dirty ground at the park snuggling with her child is wearing a fur-trimmed silk faille jacket by Prada ($3,555), a red henley ($306), stovepipe pants ($310), earrings ($2310), leather flats ($625), and carrying a heritage velvet brocade bag by Prada ($2140).
I'd like to contrast that with the outfit I am wearing.
Today I am wearing a black knit Tshirt from TJ Maxx ($8.00), a black knee length skirt from Old Navy ($12), underwear, a bra ($12.00), flip flops ($5.00) and carrying a faux leather purse that was given to me free by my neighbor. I'm sure my fossil watch cost around $65.00 and my husband won't tell me how much my wedding ring cost.
Even though I was painfully out of my league, I just had to keep reading.
Fun recipes for the kids included Almond butter and finger bananas on fruit bread, prosciutto, fried egg and parmesan on country bread, and oven-baked chicken and slow roasted tomatoes on a baguette. If you are looking for a fun getaway for your family, they recommended a surfing camp in Brazil. But then came my favorite article about the stresses of carpooling kids to school.
And I quote, "It's important to be honest when problems arise--but try to withhold judgment. If, for example, your kid tells you that Kelly's mom gave him a Twinkie, and you have a strict no-trans-fat rule, you can let it go or bring it up without sounding like a snack snob..." Ladies and gentlemen, I'm not bright enough, or skinny enough, to make these things up. If someone gave my kid a Twinkie in carpool I'd be licking the crumbs off his shirt when he got home. I don't buy Twinkies because I'd eat the whole box.
I really could go on and on. C. and I sat for about an hour one night marvelling at the strange lives some people live. We alternated between horror, strange fascination, and flat out hysterical laughing. We debated at the end if we should get a subscription just for the sheer entertainment value but we were afraid they would do a salary check to see if we were classy enough. Well, until I can figure out what prosciutto is and whether or not Wal-Mart sells baguettes, I may just have to lay in my Hello Kitty pajamas (Target, $14.00) on my donated couch (thanks Mo and Papa!) and dream!
