Night of the Living Gummy Bears

Grab a bag of gummy bears and enjoy Jacob's latest epic tale...but beware. It is NOT for the faint of heart...or those who feel a warm, sentimental attachment to their gummy bears.

Night of the Living Gummy Bears By: Jacob Carr

 

        It was 2 months, 1 week, and 4 days after National Pi Day, 2015. Most Years I would be celebrating the last day of school, but this year was different. This year I was chopping off the heads of giant gummy bears with a rusty lawn mower blade. You see, on National Pi Day a scientist by the name of John Johnson invented a mega-ultra-lightning generator 5000. When he turned it on, it hit his bag of gummy bears. The gummy bears grew enormous, ate the scientist and then swore they would take revenge on mankind for obliterating their ancestors. And then their evilness plunged the world into darkness.

        As soon as I found out, my friends and I swore that we would destroy the mega-ultra-lightning generator 5000 at all costs.

        Now we go back to May 31, fighting our way into the heart of the gummy bears’ evil.

        “The doors locked!” our weapon’s master Ethan shouted over the screams and battle cries of the members of the Resistance group.

        “What is it made of?” I yelled while nearly dodging the punch of an orange gummy bear. “Can we break it down?”

        “If we got everybody,” Ethan started but was cut short by the sound of a M-60.

        “I think Braden decided to show up,” Mitchell, our robotics expert muttered as he appeared next to me wielding a deadly rusted machete.

        Now the air was filled with the sickening sound of gummy bears being ripped apart by Braden’s madness. Braden was the most dangerous member of the Resistance. He was a trigger happy lunatic. He dangerously wielded a devastatingly destructive M-60.

        An hour after Braden showed up the ground was littered with a rainbow of colors. I found what was probably the last whole arm of a gummy bear and felt sick thinking that just an hour ago this “helpless” piece of gummy candy tried to rip off my head. Suddenly I heard a sickening rip. No screams followed though I knew before I looked back that a gummy bear had regenerated itself back into a whole sticky glob. Now we had to act fast to destroy the mega-ultra-lightning generator 5000.

        “For Narnia”, someone yelled as we all raced forward, our heads and weapons held high.

        “#!@* Narnia”, our mathematical genius Henry yelled. “For OUR world!”

        We ran into the dark, cold lab. A stench of fruit, manufactured gummy candy, burnt plastic and death filled the air. Immediately I saw the mega-ultra-lightning generator 5000. Then all heck broke loose.

        Gummy bears falling from the sky…the echoing sound of screams filled the air. I closed my eyes and threw my only weapon in the direction of what I thought was the mega-ultra-lightning generator 5000.

SOMETIME LATER…

        Now we’re all dead. It turns out my rusty lawn mower blade was also a boomerang. It also turns out giant man eating gummy bears are really good at ripping off people’s heads. So now I can safely assure you…the end of the world is not in 2012…it is in 2015. Beware.

THE END