Seriously...A Huge Headache

WARNING: The actual event that occurred in this post is not really that big of a deal...really. The whole point is how out of proportion I blew it and if I told you what really happened a couple of things would happen. First, I'd embarass one of my children to death and second, you'd think I was crazier than you already know I am. So by not spilling the "details" of the event, I'm not really hiding a big, ole' juicy event...I'm just trying to protect the innocent...and the innocent's mother's sanity.

I really think in 8 years of parenting that the last 24 hours have been my most frustrating. Really. Or have I said that before? If I have, then this is REALLY it. And it is quite possible that it is because I over-reacted to a situation...or didn't handle it exactly right...or something. I partially blame myself. And then I blame a couple of other people that I KNOW messed up. I've been through a variety of emotions today. Let me review some of them for your reading pleasure...

8:00 a.m.: Called my dad crying and wailing. By the time I talked to my mom I was just softly sobbing.

8:30 a.m.: Called my sweet husband at work to tell him I needed to give my 2 week "mothering" notice. Then I told him I needed a vacation. I couldn't decide what I really needed so I opted for some sugar cookie dough.

9:30 a.m.: Started to feel better about the situation. Got a little perspective, calmed myself down.

9:45 a.m.: Talked to a wonderful friend. Hung up feeling warm and fuzzy and grateful to amazing people in my life.

12:00 p.m.: Went in to my children's school and gave a verbal lashing to the assistant dean of something over something (I'm not really sure what she does but I know she was handling this particular situation). It was ugly, it was loud, it was confrontational and man did I feel better after it was all over. The poor woman that shares an office with the above mentioned dean of something was a little taken aback by my outburst. I'm not a confrontational woman...unless you are messing with my children and other people's children and then I can be nasty. Really nasty.

2:30 p.m.: Went to a meeting where I tried to be calm but firm. Here is where I also gained a new perspective on the situation that helped put things into a clearer state.

6:00 p.m.: Was so, so, so, so happy to see my husband walk through the door. I hugged him and kissed him and told him how much I loved him and assured him that after a little thought, I'd decided to revoke my earlier termination request and stay on the job a little longer.

It is not easy being an emotional drama queen.

I've said it before and I'll say it many times again...being a mother is HARD work. Really hard. Each of my 3 children are so different from each other but they do share some commonalities. All 3 of them are very head-strong, very independent, very strong-willed and very determined. I am so grateful for each one of those characteristics...I wouldn't change them but learning to understand my individual children and their needs is so challenging. How I would handle a problem with one is not how I would handle it with another. Some of how those characteristics manifest themself I get and sometimes I am at a total loss. I want to do what is best and sometimes I come close and sometimes I am appalled at far I miss the mark.

I am trying. But I get so frustrated at myself.

I wasn't there to see this aforementioned situation unfold. I was relying on lots of other people's information...and all of those people had a slight variation on the story. I was eager to handle the situation in a way that was appropriate for my child but not having all the facts made that hard. I realized later that I may not have given him the benefit of the doubt and may have acted too harshly. So what is the lesson learned?

The Lord knows my children PERFECTLY...all their strengths, weaknesses, joys, sorrows, etc. This parenting thing is a divine partnership. I don't have to do it alone...but I also realize that I don't rely enough on the Spirit in handling things. I tend to be very impulsive and emotional and have trouble checking what comes immediately versus what comes if I take a little time and step back from the situation, ask for help, and readdress things. The Lord can guide me, inspire me, and teach me how to be the best mom to each one of my individual children. I need to rely on that more...and be more spiritually in tune to receive that help.

Live and learn...and hope the therapy bills won't bankrupt us in the future!!

Miracles

So I finally took the time to discover what other people discovered weeks ago...and it happened because my sister Emily wrote a really beautiful blog that stopped me in my tracks yesterday. I couldn't even comment on the blog because what she said was beautiful and thought-provoking and I didn't want to comment until I had thought through what she said. And because of Emily's blog, I discovered Stephanie Nielsen's blog...and because of Stephanie Nielsen's blog, I discovered her sister Courtney's blog. And it has given me so much to think about and ponder over the last 24 hours. Really ponder. Like I said, the combination of the 3 women stopped me in my tracks...emotionally and spiritually. And last night at 2:40 a.m. I was in my daughter's room rubbing Vick's lotion on her little chest to help quiet her coughing and while kneeling next to her bed I started to pray. I prayed that the Lord would comfort HB and help her be able to sleep. I prayed that Emily would know how much she is loved and how much I appreciate her insights and testimony about life. I prayed for my mom and ML and Carrie and Sarah and Abby and Sho and while I prayed for them I marvelled at their lives. Within my own family, I know great, great women with such a variety of talents and gifts and strengths. I marvel constantly at the things each one of them does and how they influence the world around them. I prayed for Stephanie Nielsen and her sisters and her daughters and her family and pleaded that they would continue to see hope and faith and be strengthened in the journey that lies ahead of them. And when I was done, I just sat on the floor and looked at my daughter and wondered what miracles she possessed that would change this world. I believe in miracles. I see miracles every day in ordinary women and men who go about doing quiet and extraordinary things.

Miracles.

I think it is a miracle that I am alive in this time and place.

I think it is a miracle that I have the parents I do. They are miraculous in so many ways.


I think it is miracle that I have 2 brothers and 4 sisters that I love and adore and respect and inspire me in so many new and wonderful ways all the time.

I think it is a miracle that each of those siblings have found spouses that compliment them and make our family so much richer and diverse and glorious.


I think my nieces and nephews are a miracle...every single one of them. (And this is only the 1/2 on the Oscarson side...I have a whole other 1/2 on the Carr side!)


My husband is a total miracle in my life. After 9 years, I continue to be impressed by him and his many, many abilities. I think it is miraculous that he can be calm and patient and adoring even though he is married to a drama queen with lots of emotion. I love him so much.


My children are a miracle. They amaze and delight me every single day. They are so funny and smart and clever and snuggly and interesting. The place they fill in my life is so tangible.

I think it is a miracle that I found a vocation and job that I have loved so much. I wanted to be a teacher ever since I could remember. I've never even entertained anything else. I am so grateful for something I love so much that has brought me so, so, so much joy. I love teaching elementary school. I love doing storytelling. I love teaching the gospel. It is a miracle to be blessed with work you love.

I think it is a miracle that I served a mission.

I think it is a miracle that I get to be home full-time with my children.

I think it is a miracle that I live in this amazing home with a red front door and black shutters.

I think the trees lining my street that are a magnificent red are a miracle.

I think it is a miracle that I have food to eat and clothes to wear and a warm bed to sleep in.

I think the gospel is a miracle. It is a gospel of many miracles. I think having a testimony is a miracle. I think having a foundation built in and on the Lord Jesus Christ is a miracle that I continually find strength and hope and joy in. To live in this day and age and have this knowledge to guide and sustain me is a miracle.

I think it is a miracle that every day I wake up and get to make choices. Choices about how to spend my time, choices about where to spend my energy, choices about how to be happy. I think free agency and choice is a miracle.

I think friends are a miracle. I feel so blessed to know such incredible people. They uplift me, set an example for me, help me in all the areas that I am weak, make me laugh, let me cry, play with me, help me work, serve in callings with me, and assist me in raising my children. It is a miracle.

I could go on and on. And maybe I will on another day and at another time. It is so good to see the miracles in my life written down and be able to reflect on all the good that is around me. Every one of us bears burdens and suffer trials. It is an inevitable part of life. But to recognize the miracles that the Lord have given us helps me know how loved and blessed I am. It is a miracle!

Cafe Rio Pork Salad...Almost BETTER than the original

Calling all Cafe Rio addicts...especially those that live too far away to indulge as much as they would like. Found an amazing recipe...seriously tastes EXACTLY like the Cafe Rio salad. A little labor intensive but can you argue with a recipe that delivers your Cafe Rio fix any time you need it? Try it and let me know what you think...

Cafe Rio Pork Salad

P.S. Use the uncooked tortillas from Costco for the tortilla shell. Also you can use Coke or Dr. Pepper for the marinade/sauce! How great is that??

Halloween 2008

I love Halloween. I wouldn't dare be blasphemous and say it was my favorite holiday but it is definitely up there. I like it because it happens during the fall and fall is DEFINITELY my favorite time of year. I like it because it involves lots of candy...delicious, sweet candy...especially all those variations of Reese's Peanut Butter anything and Butterfingers. I like it because we dress up in costumes and get to live out a tiny little piece of our imaginations right there where everyone can see it. I like it because it doesn't involve much effort on my part but I do get huge satisfaction from watching all the festivities unfold. I don't have to buy gifts, I don't have to send cards, I'm not cold or driving through snow, and it doesn't involve the same songs being played over and over again on the radio for 2 months. Don't get me wrong...I'm no Christmas Grinch...I just really appreciate the shallow, on the surface, bizarre, fun nature of Halloween!

So let the festivities begin.

Each of the kids had picked their costumes by the beginning of October. But of course there were lots of variations along the way. JC and MC both had to chose "historical figures that lived before 1950" for their school "World History Assembly". (While I adore our charter school, we are a little nerdy sometimes. Can't we just dress up in Ninja outfits and eat candy for an hour??) JC chose to be King Tut and MC chose to be Blackbeard the Pirate (who is a very real and very fascinating person incidentally!).

For those of you who may not know my husband, he is truly one astounding and gifted man. He is responsible for the fabulous facial hair that MC is wearing and the glitzy headdress on King Tut. Really...I would be TOAST without this man! As part of the school assembly, our family was asked to decorate some pumpkins for the occasion. Since I'm not a big fan of the whole carving with the slime stuff, we opted for a slight variation. Each child got to design and construct a pumpkin. I thought they all turned out to be an interesting psychological study into our children's psyches!

JC's was a random assortment of things, MC's was a vampire, and HB's was a pink princess. The cowboy, Darth Vader and Pirate were just sort of afterthoughts...

So after the World History Assembly came the Preschool Pals Halloween Party. I was in charge this last week and so we had a school party the way you are supposed to...there were costumes, candy, chaotic games, and lots of crafts. MC went as speed racer and HB surprised me with a ballerina outfit.

After a fabulous ward Halloween carnival Thursday night and some serious trick or treating at Dad's work Friday afternoon, we were ready for the real games to begin. JC was Indiana Jones...and he looked fantastic! He even did his own "scruffy" beard with my brown eye liner pencil.

MC stayed with his original plan and went as Speed Racer. Thank you to Mo and Papa for providing a birthday present that has had lots and lots of fun use this month! HB decided to be Tinker Bell sans the wings which she claimed poked her too much. She wouldn't let me touch her hair so I had to bite my tongue and be happy with yesterday's braids. Darling husband agreed to take them out and they came home a couple of hours later staggering under the weight of those goody bags. True to nature, each handled their loot a different way.

JC unwrapped everything and dumped it in a bowl...he called it his "candy mix". MC laid everything out on the floor and carefully organized it into piles and HB just dug right in on the kitchen floor.

So when all was said and done, it was fabulous. We ate chili, we drank bloody punch, and we devoured enough candy to make us all really hyper and then crash into bed an hour later. What holiday could possibly beat that??? Only 364 more days until we can do it again!

Our Family "Stay-cation"

Fall break was upon us. The kids had 3 days off school and we were ready for a little family vacation. We tossed around several ideas but all of them involved either too much money, too much time in a car, or too much driving. Then we came up with the perfect solution...a "stay-cation". We wouldn't actually leave the house (or the state) but we would play hard, eat lots of ice-cream, and still sleep in our own beds at night. Husband and I consulted the kids...each one of them got to plan a day and amazingly enough, it was pretty unanimous. All they wanted was one night in a hotel with a swimming pool. Who knew you could satisfy 3 kids for the mere price of a 2-star hotel and a little pool?? That's my kind of economy.

So we started our adventure.

Thursday we began our stay-cation with a bang...hubby made pancakes with all manner of assorted mix-ins...bananas, chocolate chips, chocolate syrup...you name it, he can figure out how to incorporate it into a pancake. We then packed some snacks, made a lunch, and headed off for the zoo! The weather was perfect, the new carousel was open for riding, and the animals were relatively active. Especially the tiger...we sat and watched him chew on a raw femur bone for a long time. What could be more fun or animalistic than that?

After the zoo, we headed home for a little relaxation. Hubby took the 3 kids out to choose some ice-cream for dessert...they came home with 3 different containers. Apparently they couldn't agree on just ONE flavor and since we were on "stay-cation", hubby just let them each get their flavor. I thought the choices were very telling...JC chose lime sherbet, MC chose rootbeer float, and HC chose the pinkest bubble gum you've ever seen. We ate ourselves silly and watched a movie. Perfect. MY kind of vacation.

Next day, we headed out a little further from home. We drove "up north"...the furthest our children have been in this state (Just to clarify...our children have done lots of traveling and have even been OUT of the state...we've just never taken them north before). We stopped to tour Grandma and Grandpa Green's new apartment...my favorite moment was when Grandma asked the 3 kids who liked teddy bears. Well the boys were way too cool to admit they liked something as cute and cuddly as a teddy bear so Grandma calmly took HC's hand and led her in to the next room where she explained that HC could chose a little bear from the basket and take it home with her. The boys watched the whole scene very quietly but with very large eyes. Next thing I know, I hear the boys in the next room desperately trying to apologize to Grandma and explain WHY they had originally said what they did but how she had misunderstood what they meant. I loved listening to the boys beg and grovel and suspected Grandma was enjoying the whole thing as well. Eventually she let them off of the hook and they got to choose a bear as well. Funny thing...they have clutched and cuddled those bears since we left their house. Being cool can be such a conflict!

We continued driving until we reached our next destination...the Aerospace Museum. This is a museum with really cool, really big, really neat airplanes and helicopters and missiles and all manner of "flying" stuff. The kids loved looking at things for about 20 minutes and then I suspect it started to all look the same to them. A little bit of whining ensued until we stumbled upon the gold mine...a whole section filled with hands-on, try-on, play-with things to do! We spent a good chunk of time exploring things in this wing of the museum.

I spent a good deal of time launching the space shuttle. I kept waiting for the little computer to ask who the dummy was trying to figure out the launch sequence but it was very polite and gave me plenty of time to figure things out. I can't tell you the thrill I felt when the shuttle finally launched...not enough of a good feeling to make me want to go back to college and take math and science but satisfying enough to make me feel competent. It was a fun museum.

Next stop...La Quinta Inn. Like I said...nothing but the best (and cheapest possible) for this little family. We quickly got on our swimming suits and headed downstairs to swim and frolic and play. The kids loved it! As soon as we were saturated, we headed back upstairs to bathe, change and head out for some dinner. I couldn't believe how hungry we were. We sat down to a Mexican feast and hubby and I had to laugh at how fast the kids were devouring their food. We actually had to go back for some chips and salsa...and popsicles...and cookies on the way home. Stay-cations sure can make you hungry!

Next morning we dined on the continental breakfast (JC was disappointed because they didn't have any sausage...what is a stay-cation without bacon or sausage!), watched a little Cartoon Network and Disney Channel (real stay-cation treats when all you have at home is basic cable), a little more swimming, and we were off. This time we headed to a fabulous children's museum called the Treehouse. It was so very, very, very fun! One of the best children's museums I have ever been to. We ended up spending about 4 hours there and only left because it closed and they kicked us out. We planted gardens, played school, drove a firetruck, climbed a tree, slid down a slide, played life-size chess, did art projects, went to story time, acted in a play, played with dolls and dress-ups, visited the White House, met Abraham Lincoln...it was some serious fun.













After the kicked us out of the museum, we started making our way south again. We stopped for a quick bite to eat at a classy Wendy's restaurant that smelled a little like urine and had some serious customer service issues...like the sweet older lady that would take your order and then shuffle away into the dark corners somewhere and not reappear for a very long time. But who is complaining when it is ANOTHER restaurant you get to eat out at (remember we have relatively young and easy to impress children). We stopped in SLC where we went out to get some delicious, organic yogurt with Mo and Papa. (Forget that we had just had Frosties...when Papa called and asked if they could take us out for ice-cream, I started to explain that unfortunately we had just had Frosties until hubby shushed me from the driver's seat and explained that we were on "Stay-cation" which meant we could eat as much ice-cream as we wanted whenever we wanted...at this point I think the kids just thought this was the greatest stay-cation they had ever had and were raking on the extra toppings and eating with wild abandon!) But alas...even fantastic stay-cations must come to an end. We arrived home very tired, very full of sugary treats, and ready for bed.

It was a fabulous mini-vacation. I learned that you do not have to go very far from home (or even really leave your home!) to have a great, relaxing vacation. Just unplug your phones, get yourselves a few containers of ice-cream, find some new places to explore, and go crazy!